Written – summer 2012 – call me yeah!
Evening all; just got in from a date, it’s 2.46am, sitting at my breakfast bar in my kitchen; in my pants and socks, eating 2 day old left-over crispy duck and pancakes; it’s ok, I put it in the fridge and all; to tell you the truth I was kinda too nervous to eat earlier, so bloody starving now!
Was a first date, bit of a blind date really, a friend of mine was playing cupid and mentioned us to each other as he thought we would get on, weeks went by and nothing happened until one day I decided to do the right thing and I added her on twitter.
Soon she followed me back and you know, things went from there, we got direct messaging and she seemed to find me amusing enough and eventually I asked her out for a date.
I decided to take her out to this cool little place in Shoreditch. Somewhere that wasn’t too stuffy and formal, but yet not so relaxed, so it seemed I hadn’t made an effort. Somewhere with an easy menu that had a wide range as not to make her feel uncomfortable, mind you im one of the fussiest eaters going; so maybe that was more for me; I’d also already checked she wasn’t one of vegetarian types; I factor that in now as one of my first questions right there along with name and favourite football team J.
Maybe it’s because I’m a Virgo or maybe everyone does it but I plan and analyse everything. I’d kind of worked out before the date, how it would play out in my head. What kind of questions I would ask, how I would try and make her laugh, what I wanted to eat, what I wanted her to eat so I could have I bite and most importantly, what not to say!
So I decided that I wouldn’t drive tonight and would catch a cab, I know it shouldn’t be, but it is easier if you both are drinking. You can share a bottle of wine and ponder over and try out from the cocktail list. I don’t need to drink but if I’m sitting there on the sparkling water watching on, it just doesn’t make the evening run as smoothly.
So I get to the place at 7.30pm, get a txt from her, she’s running a little late in traffic, it’s ok. I just took up a seat inside the bar area looking out waiting for her arrival. Eventually she arrives looking gorgeous, Mid length blonde hair, slim, petite in this funky little pink jumper with killer heals on.
The evening started great, we each had a beer to start which I thought was pretty cool, she seemed different to what I was used too. She was quick, really sharp and witty, I felt I had to be on top form just to keep up, but conversation followed really easily; we had similar interests in common and liked the same films and both had rare steaks.
She was 2 years younger than me, but had her own little business empire running, with like 15 staff, the small little hot blonde was the boss, it didn’t really fit, in a way I was used too, to tell you the truth I was a little nervous, but I liked it. It was different, with every sentence I was drawn in deeper and deeper.
We finished dinner, skipped desert and headed down to the bar, it was already pretty late by now, we had been talking for hours. I now knew she wanted 4 children, her favourite colour was blue, she really fancied Ryan Gosling, mind you, I do a bit too; but who doesn’t! And her auntie was called Eileen.
By now we were on the cocktails and I could feel myself starting to go, No James No! I was starting to fall for her spell, in my head, I was off, I could hear my brain talking to me, wow she was amazing, I wanted to make her my girlfriend right then and there, she’s was the girl I need to marry, and I just couldn’t shut it off and then it happened I passed the point of no return.
I started saying things out loud, I mean the date was going so well up until this point, I had played it just right, interested but not to keen, attentive but not over the top, alluring but yet holding back enough to keep her interest and wanting to know more, but now, now my game plan was starting to fall apart at the seems, I started to say things that you really shouldn’t say.
So, am I what you was expecting tonight? Whats your normal type? You know you really tick all my boxes!
Why was I saying these stupid things?
Do you like me?
That was it, Dead! Game Over!
Right then and their all the challenge on her part was gone, I had turned! Turned into a 14-year-old girl! “Your Amazing!”
We got the bill swiftly afterwards, she insisted on paying half and with that in the midst of telling her I loved her and asking what days she couldn’t see me the following week; she was in a taxi and gone, probably never to be seen again!
I walked home, in the rain to sober me up. What was wrong with me? It was going so well, at one point she was hanging on every word and I thought we would be in the kitchen eating duck together.
Not much I can do now, well that is apart from send her the 5 goodnight txts I just sent just you know to make sure she’s home safe .
“Night baby, miss you xoxoxoxox”