Jammy Taylor

stop being a pigeon

“written - whilst looking for bird seed”

Now people might say, that I’m a little hyperactive; of course this is not true. Well maybe a little, you see I do get quite excitable at times. Not that this would have anything to do with the fact that I drink about three bottles of Lucozade and seven cans of Coca Cola a day or my fetish for cream eggs and then there are wine gums and Skittles, especially the red ones although if it was just the red ones in the pack without any other colours, you know for a fact that I would want a green one, just because I couldn’t. I won’t even go on to fruit pastels.

When I was younger I remember going out for a walk with my granddad every day, and living by the sea we used to go to the beach. He would teach me all about the sea and the tides and we would hunt for crabs under the rocks. At the time he was giving up smoking, so he used to eat about nine packets of fruit pastels a day to compensate, well maybe it was more like we had half each, subsequently all my baby teeth either when black or fell out, to the dismay of my next door neighbour, Auntie Annie who’s like a second mum to me, passionate about my teeth always on at me to go upstairs and clean them, even now. Thankfully I got my adult teeth through and have cut right down on the sweets and I do brush quite regularly, even my dentist comments about how lucky I’ve been, otherwise I don’t think I would be doing what I do now.

I mean I don’t always run around like a headless chicken, sometimes I even think before I speak and I don’t always mess everything up although I know for a fact that in the past maybe I have lost a few jobs as the odd client has thought that I was a bit too crazy; obviously on some happy pills, but this is Never the case, I’m just high on life.

Ok, so last Sunday night I get a text from this number, saying something along the lines of,” Hi James, how are you, I’ve just seen your commercial on the TV, do you want to go for a drink?” Now as most of my numbers are still in Brazil, I didn’t have a clue who this was. So I gave the number a call, not knowing really who to expect.

It turned out that it was only the most beautiful girl I had ever met. The particular girl in question I met a few years back whilst filming a pop video for their band, we had even chatted a bit in the past but nothing ever came of it and it had been a good six months since we last had spoken, anyway she said to give her a call tomorrow about hooking up for a drink.

So with that the following day I gave her a call and that evening we went out to a nice restaurant around the corner from where she lived. Obviously it wasn’t quite so simple as that as I did have to decide what to wear all by myself which in itself took all day.

I thought the date when really well, we had a good chat and the food was ok too and she did look every bit as gorgeous as I remembered. We were in the restaurant about two hours when we got the bill and being the perfect gentleman, I gave her a lift home; I even got a kiss on the cheek for my troubles.

Driving the one-hour journey back to my house flew by as by this time I had a huge smile on my face; pleased with how the night had gone, dancing away to all my favourite songs, with the windows down even though it was -2 outside.

Once I got home I tried to give her a call, and it just rang and rang, so I left it about another hour and sent her a text thanking her for a wonderful evening, she texted me back straight away, saying pretty much the same thing and that she would let me know when she was next free.

Two days have gone by and I still haven’t heard a thing! Maybe I came across a little excitable or maybe my idea’s of jumping on a plane together and going skiing was a little too much for her. (What?  I didn’t mean right then, no no, much later like a week or so. Not that she would know that.) Or maybe I should have let her sweat a bit and not tried calling her like all my friends were telling me, in hindsight all these things go through your mind, but when it’s happening it all seems like the right thing to do.

You see I’m just not very good with playing this whole game thing, I just can’t get to grips with it, with me its always the same story; the ones I really want, I never get; I always mess it up, getting all excited and too keen, scaring them off and as for the ones I’m not that interested in, where I don’t pay them much attention, I can’t beat them off with a stick.

I was explaining my situation today to my friend and he compared me to a pigeon. Now at first I was like, what are you talking about, but then it all made sense.

You see at the moment I am like a pigeon, I chase too many girls that I don’t really want, and then I’m too keen, bobbing my head up and down chasing them, (like a pigeon), where instead I should be more like an Eagle, soaring high up above until he sees the one girl that he really wants; when he swoops down and gets her.

I’ll get it right one day! You never know; she could just be making me sweat a bit, or maybe she’s just busy, or maybe she popped to Rio since the date. Only time will tell!